Entries tagged with “tradition” from Prom to Altar

Sometimes in the wedding planning world it feels like there is this dichotomy: your ceremony is either personal and meaningful, or it's a church wedding. For some reason, there is this belief out there that a church wedding is cookie cutter, impersonal, and only differs from wedding to wedding because of the names inserted in the vows.

Our wedding ceremony will be a Catholic mass celebrating the sacrament of holy matrimony. While the mass has to follow a certain format, we were able to choose readings, songs, participants, and there are sections that we are writing. It is far from impersonal: it is a representation of our faith and what it means to us. It is a ceremony that is about love.

The readings we've chosen are not about man owning woman, they are not fire and brimstone and an angry God: Our readings are about loving one another, about living with kindness, and about love's strength.

We chose our officiant based on his approach to Catholicism that is about love and inclusiveness. I have known our priest since I was 12, and his role in our wedding celebration is important to both Patrick and I.

The music for our ceremony will be sung by a family friend with a beautiful voice. We chose each song based on how the melody moved us, whether the lyrics spoke to us, and how it fit in with the rest of the ceremony.


We will be getting married at the same church where my parents were married, in the parish that my family has been a member of since I was born. My sister and I were baptized there, made our first communions there, and were confirmed there. The building itself is new, but it's a community I've known all my life.



True, the Catholic church isn't up for a bridal processional set to the music of Modest Mouse or readings from The Giving Tree-- but we will be taking part in a ceremony that mirrors the wedding ceremonies of our parents and grandparents and great grandparents-- on back to the roots of our family trees. That link is as important as all the rest.

As our wedding grows closer, people's questions have changed a bit. Rather than 'How's the planning going?' and 'When's the wedding?' the questions have become 'Feeling stressed?' and 'How many days now?' and the charming, "Should I not talk to you for the next 3 weeks?'. Um, thanks, I'm busy but I haven't become a monster (however, if you're going to say silly things like that maybe not talking is ok).

People also seem very concerned over whether I have my something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue. I wasn't really worried about this list (I have enough lists as it is), but all these questions have me thinking... do I have my bases covered? I don't want to miss one of these items and have our marriage crumble upon our exit from the church! It also seems to really disappoint the question-asker when I imply that I haven't given this much thought.

Here's the status:

• Old- lots of old things: my engagement ring and wedding band, the piece of my mom's wedding dress that will be wrapped around my bouquet,various other jewelry I plan to wear.
  
• New- dress, shoes, etc. Easy.
• Borrowed- this one I'm not sure on-- I'm confused about what counts as borrowed (lots of items have been passed along to me, but I think it's expected that I'll keep them until it's time for me to pass them along to another woman in the family). I suppose I should borrow a bobby pin or something to be safe.
  
• Blue- A blue brooch of my grandmother's will be pinned on my bouquet or in the hem of my dress.

Did you know that this verse actually involves a 5th item? The last line is "and a six pence in your shoe". Honestly, I don't think I'll find a six pence in the next two weeks, and I'm working hard to make sure my shoes are comfortable-- a six pence shoved in there is not part of the plan.