May 2008 Archives
(Oops- I wrote this entry over the weekend and forgot to post it.)
We started this blog to document the wedding planning process, to share a bit about our relationship, and to tell the story of how we got here. Originally it was just going to be a link from our wedding website and something for our guests to check out if they wanted.
At this point, the blog has been shared a bit beyond that circle. This is fine and good (and obviously intentional), but makes it a bit difficult to know what to talk about. Do I talk about us? About the whole wedding shabang? Should the writing be personal or general? How much should I share?
Honestly, it's going to be hard to stick to just one angle. The wedding planning process has involved a lot of thinking about us as well as a lot of thinking about the wedding industrial complex. It has involved thinking about what is meaningful to us along with tradition and ritual. It seems natural to talk about the process on all levels.
We started this blog to document the wedding planning process, to share a bit about our relationship, and to tell the story of how we got here. Originally it was just going to be a link from our wedding website and something for our guests to check out if they wanted.
At this point, the blog has been shared a bit beyond that circle. This is fine and good (and obviously intentional), but makes it a bit difficult to know what to talk about. Do I talk about us? About the whole wedding shabang? Should the writing be personal or general? How much should I share?
Honestly, it's going to be hard to stick to just one angle. The wedding planning process has involved a lot of thinking about us as well as a lot of thinking about the wedding industrial complex. It has involved thinking about what is meaningful to us along with tradition and ritual. It seems natural to talk about the process on all levels.
They just put out a new album, but their last album has a neat story to it: the couple recorded the album after a breakup-- when they got back together they discovered they'd both written songs about each other and about the experience. The album Declare A New State! is the result-- songs about the same relationship, the same breakup, from each person's perspective.
I highly recommend adding The Submarines to your summer playlist. They certainly aren't brand new to the scene, but based on tonight's crowd there are a lot of people out there who still need to discover their poppy goodness! Check out their music--
On their website
On MySpace
the edison club (our reception venue) has finally brought their website out of 1998! it's not perfect (especially if you're using firefox and the window isn't maximized. hm, i'm assuming they're working on this...), but it's so much better than what they had. you too can see it, here.
elsewhere on the web, yet another fantastic post is up on a practical wedding. go read about 'wedding industry rage'. i have my own things to say on this topic, coming soon.
in the offline world, it seems that the 'is so and so invited to the wedding?' questions have begun. sigh.
elsewhere on the web, yet another fantastic post is up on a practical wedding. go read about 'wedding industry rage'. i have my own things to say on this topic, coming soon.
in the offline world, it seems that the 'is so and so invited to the wedding?' questions have begun. sigh.
one or our first orders of business now that patrick is done done done with finals (YAY!) is to work on our honeymoon plans. so far, we know that we're going to san diego, and we know where we're staying for most of our trip (my very sweet aunt and uncle gave us a week of their timeshare as a wedding present).
we're planning on flying out on the tuesday or wednesday after the wedding (yep, still need to book those flights), and our reservation at the condo doesn't start until friday. we're looking for a hotel for our first couple of days, preferably someplace by the beach, where we can relax and recoup and get massages while sipping foofy drinks and basking in our newly married status. ideally, i'd love to find a place in la jolla. suggestions?
we'd like to fill our week in san diego (well, technically outside of san diego, but close enough) with city exploration, museums, legoland, some hiking, the zoo, and of course: eating! i was reading our fodors guide to socal last night and the descriptions of california cuisine made me certain that a good part of this honeymoon will be spent eating. a good part of that eating will involve avocados.
so, does anyone have any san diego itinerary suggestions for us? la jolla hotel recommendations? names of restaurants not to be missed? tell me, tell me!
we're planning on flying out on the tuesday or wednesday after the wedding (yep, still need to book those flights), and our reservation at the condo doesn't start until friday. we're looking for a hotel for our first couple of days, preferably someplace by the beach, where we can relax and recoup and get massages while sipping foofy drinks and basking in our newly married status. ideally, i'd love to find a place in la jolla. suggestions?
we'd like to fill our week in san diego (well, technically outside of san diego, but close enough) with city exploration, museums, legoland, some hiking, the zoo, and of course: eating! i was reading our fodors guide to socal last night and the descriptions of california cuisine made me certain that a good part of this honeymoon will be spent eating. a good part of that eating will involve avocados.
so, does anyone have any san diego itinerary suggestions for us? la jolla hotel recommendations? names of restaurants not to be missed? tell me, tell me!
wedding stuff has been on the back burner lately, as patrick has been up to his eyeballs in projects and papers and general finals stress. (and despite the people who act like i'm just teasing when i tell them, we really are full partners in this planning process. plans are more or less on hold until we're both able to focus on them.) he'll finish up this week and he gets a few days to recover before we dive back into wedding world. i can't wait to reclaim my fiance from the grips of academia!
we did get the mock up of our invitations from meg last week. i'm not going to show them to you, but i will say that i LOVE them. she totally 'got' what we were going for and came up with a great design. it's so nice to have such talented friends and family!
speaking of diving into the wedding world, i have one thing to leave you with before i go: i saw this beauty advertised on a wedding website as a cake topper. seriously? are they serious?
we did get the mock up of our invitations from meg last week. i'm not going to show them to you, but i will say that i LOVE them. she totally 'got' what we were going for and came up with a great design. it's so nice to have such talented friends and family!
speaking of diving into the wedding world, i have one thing to leave you with before i go: i saw this beauty advertised on a wedding website as a cake topper. seriously? are they serious?
i mean, really. they have some others that are just as good.
the number of confusing wedding-related acronyms and abbreviations is out of control. when i first started reading wedding blogs and websites i felt like i needed a decoder ring to figure out what the heck these girls were talking about. jen also expressed her confusion at the terms used by these brides-to-be all over the internet-- "what's an e-ring? do i need some sort of electronic ring?" oooh, apparently "engagement ring" is just too many letters to write out.
when i sent the bridesmaids a link from one of these wedding blogs, grace wrote back and made me promise i would never refer to them as BMs: "I am not sure if it is just because I work in healthcare, but we use this word on a daily basis to mean something a little less pleasant than a bridesmaid. So I am making a request: please, please don't call us BMs!"
and then there's the ever-present STD abbreviation. what were you thinking? of course STD means save the date! we also rejected this one in favor of SD. i can only imagine the ads gmail would start placing above my inbox if it were full of info about STDs. and now i dread the kind of spam this blog is going to get after that mention.
e-pics was one that had me confused for a while. what were these epics all these girls were having done? where does one get an epic? is this some sort of beauty treatment? pre-marital counseling sessions?
alas, the first batch of our epics (engagement photos, if you want to take the time to use all those extra syllables) are online. check them out if you're interested by going to the home page of our photographers' site and scrolling down a little to the blurb about us, or go directly to the gallery.
when i sent the bridesmaids a link from one of these wedding blogs, grace wrote back and made me promise i would never refer to them as BMs: "I am not sure if it is just because I work in healthcare, but we use this word on a daily basis to mean something a little less pleasant than a bridesmaid. So I am making a request: please, please don't call us BMs!"
and then there's the ever-present STD abbreviation. what were you thinking? of course STD means save the date! we also rejected this one in favor of SD. i can only imagine the ads gmail would start placing above my inbox if it were full of info about STDs. and now i dread the kind of spam this blog is going to get after that mention.
e-pics was one that had me confused for a while. what were these epics all these girls were having done? where does one get an epic? is this some sort of beauty treatment? pre-marital counseling sessions?
alas, the first batch of our epics (engagement photos, if you want to take the time to use all those extra syllables) are online. check them out if you're interested by going to the home page of our photographers' site and scrolling down a little to the blurb about us, or go directly to the gallery.
"Same-sex couples have a constitutional right to marry, the California Supreme Court ruled Thursday."
Right on, California! Welcome (back) to the club, which previously counted Massachusetts as its one lonely member. Now we just need 48 more members to sign up. A long way to go, but it's a good start.
This seems like a good time to post an excerpt from "Goodridge Vs. Department of Health" by Massachusetts Supreme Court Chief Justice Margaret H. Marshall, the ruling that legalized same-sex marriage here. This is one of my favorite bits of writing on marriage. If we could, I would include this in our ceremony:
"Marriage is a vital social institution. The exclusive commitment of two individuals to each other nurtures love and mutual support; it brings stability to our society. For those who choose to marry, and for their children, marriage provides an abundance of legal, financial, and social benefits. In return it imposes weighty legal, financial, and social obligations....Without question, civil marriage enhances the "welfare of the community." It is a "social institution of the highest importance." ...
Marriage also bestows enormous private and social advantages on those who choose to marry. Civil marriage is at once a deeply personal commitment to another human being and a highly public celebration of the ideals of mutuality, companionship, intimacy, fidelity, and family.... Because it fulfills yearnings for security, safe haven, and connection that express our common humanity, civil marriage is an esteemed institution, and the decision whether and whom to marry is among life's momentous acts of self-definition."
Northampton Pride 2008
update- Do your part to hold up this ruling: give your time/money/support to Equality for All. The right wing is already stepping in to turn it around. Can we play like the conservatives and call them anti-love? we should at least start calling gay marriage supporters pro-love. It's the kind of rhetoric Republicans are great at-- and the kind or rhetoric Democrats just don't do well at all.
Right on, California! Welcome (back) to the club, which previously counted Massachusetts as its one lonely member. Now we just need 48 more members to sign up. A long way to go, but it's a good start.
This seems like a good time to post an excerpt from "Goodridge Vs. Department of Health" by Massachusetts Supreme Court Chief Justice Margaret H. Marshall, the ruling that legalized same-sex marriage here. This is one of my favorite bits of writing on marriage. If we could, I would include this in our ceremony:
"Marriage is a vital social institution. The exclusive commitment of two individuals to each other nurtures love and mutual support; it brings stability to our society. For those who choose to marry, and for their children, marriage provides an abundance of legal, financial, and social benefits. In return it imposes weighty legal, financial, and social obligations....Without question, civil marriage enhances the "welfare of the community." It is a "social institution of the highest importance." ...
Marriage also bestows enormous private and social advantages on those who choose to marry. Civil marriage is at once a deeply personal commitment to another human being and a highly public celebration of the ideals of mutuality, companionship, intimacy, fidelity, and family.... Because it fulfills yearnings for security, safe haven, and connection that express our common humanity, civil marriage is an esteemed institution, and the decision whether and whom to marry is among life's momentous acts of self-definition."
Northampton Pride 2008 update- Do your part to hold up this ruling: give your time/money/support to Equality for All. The right wing is already stepping in to turn it around. Can we play like the conservatives and call them anti-love? we should at least start calling gay marriage supporters pro-love. It's the kind of rhetoric Republicans are great at-- and the kind or rhetoric Democrats just don't do well at all.
a few days after christmas this year, my cousin lisa gave me a box that was left out of the gift pile on christmas eve. i sat in my parents' living room and opened it-- pushed aside the tissue paper, and found a beautiful crocheted bag, lined with satin. it was clearly a wedding item. once i'd opened and admired it, lisa told me the story of the bag.my grandmother made the bag for lisa to carry on her wedding day 14 years ago. according to my mom and my aunts, my grandmother made these bags for all of her daughters and granddaughters to carry on the day of their wedding- small satin drawstring bags with dainty crocheted details. my mom and her sisters used their bags for collecting cards as they greeted people at the reception and lisa used hers for her personal items that day. i had no idea these bags existed or that my grandmother had made even one, let alone many. when lisa passed on this gift she gave me a chance to be a part of a family tradition that easily could have faded away. grandma would be proud: to her, family was everything.
it's sunday night and we just came back from our
engagement photo session-- over the past two hours we've had a camera aimed at us more than we have in the past ten years combined! we tend to be the ones behind the camera most of the time, so we were both a bit nervous about the idea of a full photo shoot focused on us (this was part of the point, of course: to get over those nerves before september).paul and brenda came out to northampton, and we spent the afternoon ambling around town and the campus of smith college. they took tons of photos, and were full of ideas. it was a good chance to get to know our photographers and their working style better, and to get more comfortable in front of the camera (something i have never been, despite growing up with a photographer dad). it also meant a lot to be able to capture a bit of our life here in northampton. it was a great day-- we had fun, took the time to enjoy each other, and soaked up a glorious may afternoon.
as of yesterday, the forecast for today was grim: cold, rainy, gray. yesterday was raw, and i couldn't imagine getting good photos in that kind of biting weather. we talked about canceling and rescheduling (again-- we already canceled once, back in april), or doing the photos when we were in albany. i fretted about what to do, pat calmed me down and we examined our options. we ultimately decided to stick with our plan: things would work out the way they were meant to, or so pat promised.
as paul and brenda arrived in our parking lot, the clouds were getting ready to pack up and call it a day. for the rest of the afternoon the sun stuck around, with a few bouts of just the right amount of overcast to make for good lighting. the temperature shot up 10 degrees and hovered around 65. our faith paid off, and we ended up with the perfect afternoon. it would be nice if just having faith were enough to guarantee this kind of weather luck on our wedding day!
we have a way of balancing each other out-- we don't always fall into the same roles, but we nearly always center each other. this time around it was my turn to worry and fret and attempt to plan the unplannable (i think i just made up that word). it was patrick's turn to remain calm, to lay out all the options, and to bring some logic to the situation. in the end, he was right on: things worked out the way they were meant to work out.
just a quick post to say thank you to meg at a practical wedding for mentioning this lil blog!
meg's blog is refreshing and helpful, and her wedding is going to be lovely. i think we are kindred wedding planning souls. her tagline, 'creative, thrifty, sane' speaks to me!
there have been a number of budget-focused posts in the wedblog world recently, a trend that i appreciate. it's nice to be inspired by the WOW weddings that are more production than celebration, but it's also nice to be reminded that most of us are planning within the reality of budgets, a shaky economy, and prices that just keep on climbing. cheers to practicality!
5/2 update: here's one more! (although i disagree about #7. at least in our case, every 'non-traditional' venue we looked at had plenty of hidden costs-- insurance, rentals, rain plans, restrictions on music, exclusive vendors, and so forth).
meg's blog is refreshing and helpful, and her wedding is going to be lovely. i think we are kindred wedding planning souls. her tagline, 'creative, thrifty, sane' speaks to me!
there have been a number of budget-focused posts in the wedblog world recently, a trend that i appreciate. it's nice to be inspired by the WOW weddings that are more production than celebration, but it's also nice to be reminded that most of us are planning within the reality of budgets, a shaky economy, and prices that just keep on climbing. cheers to practicality!
5/2 update: here's one more! (although i disagree about #7. at least in our case, every 'non-traditional' venue we looked at had plenty of hidden costs-- insurance, rentals, rain plans, restrictions on music, exclusive vendors, and so forth).
